A Smooth Intern

I hate looking at my text messages the morning after I get drunk.  It’s like I turn into a guy who thinks he’s smooth, and if you know me well, you’ll know that the only time the words “me” and “smooth” are used in the same sentence is when there is a “not” in the middle.  I start mashing keys trying to put together awkward “this is me hitting on you” one-liners filled with misspellings while I wobble around looking like Liu Kang about to be fatalitied.

This doesn’t happen all the time, which is a good thing.  My body usually doesn’t allow me to blackout without getting sick first (good looking out, body).  But occasionally I’ll have a grey out, and thing get fuzzy.  Then I’ll wake up and check my phone only to have an entire conversation comes flooding back in to my mind.  And riding that wave of memories is my ego riddled with shame.  What’s worse is that, at the time, I think it’s actually working.  Whoops…

Anyways, on to a few lessons I learned this week.

You shouldn’t stop yourself from doing something because you’re afraid of how you’ll feel if you lose it.  If it’s important to you, then you can’t let “because I’m afraid I’ll get hurt” stop that.  The only time “because I’m afraid to get hurt” is a good excuse is when you’re doing something that physically puts your life in danger, and telling someone you like them and showing it doesn’t fall into the “life threatening” category.

Relationships need to be reciprocal.  If they’re not, then one person is just volunteering their time, energy, money and love into something they thought was a good cause.  But you can only volunteer for so long before you need something back.  Eventually, most people get smart and move on once they realize it’s no longer a good cause.  The people who don’t manage their relationships well end up with no friends and a bunch of cats.

The strength of a relationship can be determined by the amount that you’re willing to give to/for that person.  A relationship should be selfless, not selfish.  Of course, there’s always a fine line between how much you can give without receiving before you realize you’re just interning at the law firm Jerk, Douche & Bitch, and in reality, you were never going to be more than just an unpaid servant trying to move up.  Take it from an intern that spent half of a decade at one…

That didn’t come out bitter at all.  At least I got some really good experience.

In closing…

If you have nothing left to eat, eat a bug
If you have nothing left to cut, cut a rug
If you have nothing left for life, find a plug
If you have nothing left to give, give a hug

Thanks for reading.

– Liu Kang Texts


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