Is there anything cuter than kids playing with puppies? I’m not sure. There might be though. This weekend I was walking back to my apartment and I saw a little five-year-old boy stomping around in his plastic roller blades. He was wearing a red Fubu jersey. He smiled at me and waved. And not like the wave where you shake your hand from left to right. It was the kind where you close and re-open your hand. Like the way little kids wave. Thanks for the smile, little Fubu boy. It’s like this little kid.
I’m not sure if this happens to anyone else, but when I am using a public bathroom, I only have to fart when people walk in. When there is no one in the bathroom, absolutely no gas. As soon as someone comes in, I don’t know if my body freaks out cause someone is in there with me or what, but gas builds up and needs to come out. Thank goodness for loud flushes. If you flush and fart at the same time, it almost masks it completely. Almost…
I think that’s the only time you can be embarrassed and relieved at the same time. Get it? Cause when you fart it feels good, but it can be embarrassing. But typically funny…
When you get pants-ed but not everything comes down, I guess that’s embarrassing and relieving at the same time. You feel embarrassed because your pants are down, but are relieved that your underwear didn’t come down too. Unless you decided to go commando that day. Then people can see everything, plus, they know you’re a weirdo that doesn’t wear underwear.
That’s the first time I’ve ever written out pants-ed. It doesn’t look right, but o well.
I don’t know if it’s just me, but there are very few commercials that actually interest me in buying things. But then again, maybe I’m not in the market to buy a lot of things. But there are some things I just don’t understand. Like every Gieko commercial. Really Gieko? You sell auto insurance and your mascot is three stupid cavemen who hate your marketing campaign and a freaking talking gecko.
Or like the new miracle whip commercial? Seriously what the heck. You thought that was a good idea? Don’t be so mayo…
Or Milk’s new campaign? You can’t be serious. White Gold What happened to all white letters on a black background saying “Got Milk” That was all you needed. You didn’t need to change it to some weird rock guy that carries a milk filled guitar.
What about snuggies? Like the blanket with sleeves thing? I don’t understand why they are dancing in almost every scene.
Do you ever feel like you’ve struck out so many times, you wonder if you just need a break to work on mechanics or if it’s time to hang up the cleats? I wonder that sometimes.
Thanks for reading
-The Commercial Critic